Not to go batshit crazy because my eldest is having the mother of all tantrums about homework and has proceeded to go around the house throwing things on the floor, destroying things, and refusing to be reasoned with.

This is not normal. When did she become not normal?

I was putting some stuff in the recycle bin and closed the door to the garage...right over my toe. It ripped a good portion of the nail off to expose some of the nail bed. And there was some bleeding. And maybe some lightheadedness.

Ow.

Yesterday, I was so disgusted with my hair, I was almost ready to try to trim and color it myself. Instead I marched over to the local beauty salon and made an appointment. I have to say my stylist, Miranda, is a freakin' genius. I am so thrilled with the color and cut! As a note, the front picture is after it lost some it's volume in the heat and humidity. Also, try not to squint too hard in the glare from my shiny skin.

Front:



And back:


Do you know how hard it was to get a picture of the back of my hair? The top and front are a golden blonde and it goes progressively darker to a red/brown in back. I love it (but my wallet doesn't, Miranda does not come cheap)!

Aqua Dots are the perfect size to plug up the drainage holes in our sink disposal.

You do not want to know how I found that out.

I'm hoping they dissolve, because otherwise? It ain't gonna be pretty.

How stupid is it that I'm disproportionately excited that my little parakeet is learning how to talk? He says "Kiss Kiss" and makes a lip smacking noise, he sometimes says "Snickers" his name, and just now as he's sitting on my shoulder I heard him say "Hello". It's not entirely clear yet, but it's good to know he's learning.

When my girls were babies, I finally understood how deeply a mother can love her children. I ached with that love and knew that I wouldn't hesitate to throw myself in front of a moving train if it meant keeping my girls safe. What wasn't anticipated was the pain I would feel when one of my girls is in pain. Not physical pain, but emotional pain. When we moved last year, we did it for all the right reasons, at least I like to think we did. The school is better, the neighborhood is better, the location is ideal. One side effect that blindsided me was how hard it's been for Emily, my oldest, to start third grade at a new school. Last year, by October, I broke down in front of all the mom's at school when my neighbor asked how things were going. Emily had no friends, was doing everything in her power to avoid going to school, and was frequently combative at home because of it all. With the help of the school social worker (LOVE her!) Emily made a few friends, which was the springboard for making a few more. She may never have a lot of friends, but a few close ones are all she needs to get through. We started this school year with high hopes. A friend or two is in her class, and she walked in the first day with a friend and a smile. The second day, she came home sullen and surly, saying nobody plays with her on the playground and no one sits with her at lunch.

I don't know if it's been mentioned, but she has food allergies to peanuts and tree nuts, so she sits at the end of the lunch table and the kids that sit next to and across from her have to have nut free lunches. I do say it's better than putting them at an entirely different table and making them feel different.

Compounding things are issues she has had with a girl who used to be friends with her. This girl had slept over at our house and Emily slept at hers. The met through the social worker at school, she hosts a lunch once a week for kids who are having difficulties making friends or adjusting. These two girls became very close. One day, very suddenly, this girl stopped talking to Emily. Just ignored her. Emily emailed her, and she got nasty responses in return. Both her mother and I tried to figure out what happened, since Emily has no clue and was totally blindsided. The most her mother discovered was that she may have taken something Emily said offhand in a way in which it was not intended. Other than that vague explanation, we have no details, and none seem to be forthcoming from this girl. Compounding this, is that this girl has started making faces at Emily during school (sticking her tongue out, etc.). And Emily's best friend overheard her talking about Emily behind her back, making fun of her hair saying it was messy (it's curly and often unruly, but not altogether messy. Here is what it looks like most of the time )

and saying that Emily "freaks her out" and things of that nature. As you can imagine, I'm thrilled to hear this, like it's not hard enough for her to make friends, but someone is prejudicing people against her.

When Emily came home last Tuesday all sullen, I talked to her and it's just killing her that the girl she had the most fun with has turned nasty. She cried for so long and I just held her and cried. You see, I had my own version of this in grade school and wasn't accepted very readily (I had skipped a grade), and it was impossible not to feel that hurt all over again with Emily. But knowing the same pain still doesn't help me fix it, since this is not something easily fixable.

But we have word that they might be moving in the near future (apparently their house is on the market), and if that is the case, the problem is solved in that way. But the pain Emily feels will be there for a while. And when this family moves, Emily will miss this girl, even after all this. She misses her already and because this girl won't share what happened with anyone, Emily has no way to make it right. We've tried to find a way for Emily to just let this girl and her issues go, and while intellectually I think Emily understands why it needs to be done, emotionally it's wrenching, because she has to let go of any hope of this girl being friends with her, and no one likes to give up on hope.

I think I'm going to bookmark Mir's latest entry and try to use some of her tips. I have to update my arsenal of parenting tools anyway.

Actual phone conversation from earlier today:

*phone rings*
Me: "Hello?"
Caller: "Is Dottie there?"
Me: "No, I'm sorry you have the wrong number there is no Dottie here."
Caller: "Well this is the last listed number I have for Dottie Lastname."
Me: "From how long ago, we've had this number for six years?"
Caller: "From 1994. How did we spell her name? Was it Dottie L-A-S-T.....?"
Me (interrupting): "I don't know, there is NO Dottie here and I never knew a Dottie!"
Caller: "Sorry then, thank you"
*hang up*

WTF? About 3 years ago I had received these mysterious calls for Dottie, then they stopped for a while. Now we're averaging about one a week. Next time someone calls, I'm going to ask who they are and spell it out that Dottie is not here and apparently she no longer is reachable at this number. If the above conversation is any indication, I may have to speak slowly.

You know how those BP commercials always seem to have some environmental message in them? It seem hypocritical concerning what has recently been a growing concern. There is a huge controversy a-brewin' here in Chicago, and it will definately make me think twice about swimming in the lake.

"BP, which aggressively markets itself as an environmentally friendly corporation, sought to dump more ammonia and suspended solids into Lake Michigan as part of a $3.8 billion expansion that will enable the refinery to process more heavy Canadian crude oil.
More here.

Apparently they found a way to increase the amount of sludge and ammonia they can dump without breaking the law (written in the 70's). As long as they don't go over the dumping limits as spelled out in the law, they can increase the amount they are dumping.

They therefore managed to get a water permit to pump 35 percent more sludge and 54 percent more ammonia into the lake, right up to the limit set by the '70s pollution law.

Now, I'm not a scientist, but this doesn't sound good. As an argument to the controversy, Dennis Byrne of the Chicago Tribune writes...
Note also might be taken of the fact that no ammonia limits are imposed on a bunch of papermakers and cities such as Milwaukee and Green Bay.

and...
Also conveniently missing from the debate is the context that could be provided by comparing BP with other industrial and city "dischargers." According to the EPA, BP's 4,925 pounds of suspended solids allowed a day compares with 16,630 at International Steel Group's East Chicago plant and 121,861 at its Burns Harbor facility. Ispat Industries' East Chicago plant is allowed 130,453 pounds, about 27 times BP's limit. Chicago, of course, is on another planet, permitted 243,000 pounds, almost 50 times BP's.

Not mentioned is the fact that BP alone is responsible for 3 pounds of mercury a year being dumped into the lake. The lake that provides drinking water for millions of people. Not to mention the sport fishing that takes place. And once again, BP says that the environmental effects are negligible. However, there have always been limits on consuming certain fish in the lake due to mercury, and the only outlet for the lake is the St. Lawrence River, which heads out to sea (that's how Chicago is an International Seaport).

Now, granted a lot of this isn't dumped in the lake, and Mr. Byrne says much of it is dumped in the river (which may be worse, it's like sharing the crap with everyone down river), and it's still stunning when you realize these figures are PER DAY, but pointing out someone else doing the same thing still doesn't make it right.

It's like the argument I have to have with my kids,

"But Mom, she has a cookie!"
"Yes, but that still doesn't mean you can have one."

Whether or not I agree that the stuff they are dumping is harmful or safe, I think that the growing controversy surrounding this issue is a good thing if it raises environmental awareness so all companies that dump waste into the lake or river, regardless of how much that might be, find a way to reduce waste.

In the last few days, there has been a few things going on between me and my favorite coffee company. I'll put it in bullet format mostly because I haven't used bullets in a while.

• I am sending an email to complain about a certain Starbucks location near me. Even though I get my order messed up EVERY SINGLE TIME I go there, I still go there on a semi-regular basis because they are the nearest one with a drive-thru. I order a Cinnamon latte. What I get is either a Cinnamon Dolce latte, or a latte with no syrup, or a latte with no syrup with cinnamon powder sprinkled on top (eww). Or I go in there, order a "triple venti cinnamon non-fat latte", and invariably get the response "Is that a Cinnamon Dolce?" Listen bitch, did I say dolce? No, I did not! Which brings me to the sad news that



• I was informed by my regular Starbucks' staff (whom I LOVE with pink puffy hearts, because they ALWAYS get it right the first time) that the regular Cinnamon flavored syrup is being discontinued at the end of this month. Apparently I'm the only one who ever orders a regular Cinnamon flavored drink. Stupid Dolce! The staff recommended I buy a bottle or two to have at home (another reason I love them).



• I retrieved the mail and found a padded envelope from Starbucks. Upon opening, I discovered a lovely little thank you for drinking my way into debt by way of my favorite crack house:

Tomorrow night my mom and dad are taking us to see High School Musical Live! I must have had a crappy adolescence or something because I am enjoying things aimed at the younger generation much more than I thought possible (Harry Potter, High School Musical, etc.).

I guess that's one of the benefit of having kids, you can still like this stuff but act as though it's all for the kids. Like Harry Potter. Emily and I dressed up to go to the whole release party thing that was going on in our town. Somewhere along the line, someone took our picture and I have no idea if it was for any kind of publication or not. But still, we had a blast! And High School Musical? I know all the words to all the songs and could probably do some of the dance moves too. I'm actually more excited than I should be that we are going.